4 Ways To Maintain Integrity When Your Wife Isn't Around by Tito Brown
While many men would wrongfully relish at the idea of getting time to themselves, I was terrified because I knew Satan is always waiting to destroy. If you were honest with yourself, I am sure you could admit that when you are left on your own – your mind, heart, words, and eyes can wander in directions they do not belong. At least, I know that’s true for me. So how in this world would I survive two weeks alone?
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. (1 Peter 5:8)
I am reminded of the story of Noah. If you are unfamiliar with the story of Noah, here’s a concise recap:
In Genesis 6, God is lamenting over the sin that has seemingly overtaken all of humanity. As a result of man’s wickedness, God reluctantly decides to wipe out all of humanity and start from scratch. However, there was one man that was not corrupted amidst all of the wickedness – Noah. Perhaps you remember the next part of the story. God instructs Noah to build an ark in order to save him, his family, and two every every species of animal. As God instructed Noah to enter the ark, God says to him, “for you alone I have seen to be righteous before Me in this time.” It is in this moment that we realize, as everyone in the whole world around him was doing wrong, Noah rose up and still chose to do what was right. It was for Noah’s righteousness that he was spared the calamity that was brought upon all the wicked. Even though Noah was alone in his ways, it did not deter him from doing what was right.
…for you alone I have seen to be righteous before Me in this time. (Genesis 7:1)
Perhaps I am being melodramatic, but I sense that many of us feel similar to Noah. In a world where men are expected to loathe their wives, how alone do we feel in our pursuit to love ours? Your buddies talk bad about their wives, your buddies check other women out, your buddies reminisce on the “good ol’ days” before marriage, your buddies imply life would be better without a wife, your buddies flaunt their bedroom escapades as if their wife is an object for affection rather than the object of their affection, your buddies talk of divorce so they can be “free”, your buddies look at porn…your buddies…your buddies…your buddies… The list could go on and on. And even though I say your buddies, the truth is, we do these things as well. So how can we honestly expect our marriage to thrive when we fail so often?
Going back to when I mentioned the wandering of your mind, heart, words, and eyes – I offer you the four things that helped me maintain integrity even though my wife wasn’t around.